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How To Talk About Sex (And Consent) 4 Lessons From The Kink Community


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Table of Contents

  1. Why is it important to talk about sex?
  2. How to start the conversation?
  3. What to say and what not to say?
  4. Dealing with discomfort
  5. Keeping the conversation going

Why is it important to talk about sex?

Talking about sex with your partner is essential for maintaining a healthy relationship. It helps build trust and intimacy, and it's a way to share your desires and boundaries. Communication is key in any relationship, and sex is no exception. By talking about sex, you and your partner can ensure that both of you are comfortable and satisfied in the bedroom. Sexual preferences and boundaries are unique to each individual, and it's essential to discuss them openly and honestly with your partner. This conversation can help prevent misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and even sexual misconduct. It's important to note that talking about sex doesn't necessarily mean having sex. It's a way to share your thoughts and feelings with your partner, and it can be an enjoyable and exciting experience.

How to start the conversation?

Starting the conversation about sex can be intimidating, but it doesn't have to be. It's essential to choose the right time and place to have this conversation. Make sure you and your partner are relaxed and comfortable. You can start by asking your partner how they feel about talking about sex or by sharing your thoughts and feelings about the subject. It's important to approach the conversation without judgment or criticism. Remember, this conversation is about sharing your desires and boundaries, not about assigning blame or fault. Be open-minded and listen to your partner's thoughts and feelings. You may learn something new about your partner that you didn't know before.

What to say and what not to say?

When talking about sex with your partner, it's important to be clear and honest. Share your thoughts and feelings about what you like and don't like in the bedroom. Be specific about your boundaries and what you're comfortable with. It's also important to listen to your partner's thoughts and feelings and to respect their boundaries. Avoid using judgmental language or criticizing your partner's preferences. Remember, everyone has unique sexual preferences, and what works for one person may not work for another. Avoid using derogatory language or making assumptions about your partner's desires.

Dealing with discomfort

It's common to feel uncomfortable or embarrassed when talking about sex with your partner. It's essential to acknowledge these feelings and to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding. Remember, your partner may also be feeling uncomfortable or embarrassed. Take breaks if the conversation becomes too intense or overwhelming. You can also use humor to lighten the mood or to diffuse any tension. It's important to remember that talking about sex is a process, and it may take several conversations to cover everything.

Keeping the conversation going

Talking about sex is an ongoing process, and it's important to keep the conversation going. Check in with your partner regularly to see if there are any changes or new boundaries. You can also try new things in the bedroom and share your thoughts and feelings about the experience. Remember, communication is essential in any relationship, and talking about sex is no exception. Open and honest communication can help build trust and intimacy, and it's a way to share your desires and boundaries with your partner.

Conclusion

Talking about sex with your partner can be intimidating, but it's essential for maintaining a healthy relationship. By discussing your desires and boundaries openly and honestly, you and your partner can ensure that both of you are comfortable and satisfied in the bedroom. Remember, communication is key, and it's important to approach the conversation without judgment or criticism. Keep the conversation going, and don't be afraid to try new things in the bedroom.

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